Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize