every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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