Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Your cock deserves a montage
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm sobbing to NWA
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
