the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
last night I used snow as a chaser
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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