Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
They have beer where we have blood.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize