At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
MIDGETS
????
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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