Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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