idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
