Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
you made out with another girl for some wings
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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