Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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