How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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