Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
50% drunk capacity currently
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize
