Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I just forgot I was standing up.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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