Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
