i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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