Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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