i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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