I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
