Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
