somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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