I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
