I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
