i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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