If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize