Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize