This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
