Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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