He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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