Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
