bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize