i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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