? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
