is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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