the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
