haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
