id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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