no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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