i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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