also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize
