When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
