I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
