Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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