Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I am naked and annoyed.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
