I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
