idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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