I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
