Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
