i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Randomize
