waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Randomize
