So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
